Wednesday, February 14, 2007
The Gender Genie
It's been so long since I posted here that I am a little jittery and anxious about it. What will I say? Will it be good? Will it be funny? Will it be met with approbation and delight?
I feel the need to reaffirm my Nerds for Words pledge: I am a Nerd. I like Words. I write Words for Nerds. I am a Nerd for Words. There...
Actually, in this post I want to share a little friend I have recently met with all of you. "All" meaning Charles and Ted and the three other ghosts that possibly haunt these electronic halls but more probably have have left us for better blogpastures.
And lest we all forget - HELLO KITTY!
Anyway, my new friend is a robot, and if you know me at all you know that I love robots and I am always glad to gain the acquaintance of a new robot friend. When I was a child I was promised that my adult world would be populated by a plethora of robots, and I must admit that so far I am pretty disappointed because I meet actual robots with such infrequency.
But this robot exists in cyberspace, which means that he is non-existent in reality, and only then quasi-existent. He is the Gender Genie, and his function is to take a piece of text (words) that you supply him - and he inputs your text into his handy-dandy robot text measuring robot machine - and presto! He can tell whether you are a male or female! He can also rate just how "male" or "female" your text is, which can be somewhat disconcerting to sexobulators and closet hermaphrothrobic norpses with testicumulus phobias.
Here's how it works. For instance, take the following text:
"George W. Bush is a forking idiot and I love lilac eyeliner and pumps with pink chiffon tampon menstrual feelings hurt kind of like do I look fat in these jeans"
Presto! It gets the following rating from the Gender Genie robot: Female Score: 60 / Male Score: 22
Now that's weird because, being a male, I shouldn't write like a female, right? er...
What does the Gender Genie say about this? ....
"Guns are great and hunting and peeing on the floor with chewing tobacco porno muscles nascar farts with steak boxing baseball football basketball sports porn and I scratch the war with explosions car chases cleavage and mommy"
The surprising thing is, according to the Gender Genie robot, this speech gets the rating of: Female Score: 172
Male Score: 42 ... which means that it's even MORE girly than the first one!
The Gender Genie knows what's what, and you can't escape its perfect robotic logic - so try it yourself and find out whether you write like a girl or a guy.
And, hey, just so you know that the Gender Genie GOTS IT GOIN ON - that last paragraph was scored: Female Score: 35
Male Score: 103
BOOYA! (I be male)
J$
PS: You can find the Gender Genie online at: http://bookblog.net/gender/genie.html ¶ 10:14 PM
It's been so long since I posted here that I am a little jittery and anxious about it. What will I say? Will it be good? Will it be funny? Will it be met with approbation and delight?
I feel the need to reaffirm my Nerds for Words pledge: I am a Nerd. I like Words. I write Words for Nerds. I am a Nerd for Words. There...
Actually, in this post I want to share a little friend I have recently met with all of you. "All" meaning Charles and Ted and the three other ghosts that possibly haunt these electronic halls but more probably have have left us for better blogpastures.
And lest we all forget - HELLO KITTY!
Anyway, my new friend is a robot, and if you know me at all you know that I love robots and I am always glad to gain the acquaintance of a new robot friend. When I was a child I was promised that my adult world would be populated by a plethora of robots, and I must admit that so far I am pretty disappointed because I meet actual robots with such infrequency.
But this robot exists in cyberspace, which means that he is non-existent in reality, and only then quasi-existent. He is the Gender Genie, and his function is to take a piece of text (words) that you supply him - and he inputs your text into his handy-dandy robot text measuring robot machine - and presto! He can tell whether you are a male or female! He can also rate just how "male" or "female" your text is, which can be somewhat disconcerting to sexobulators and closet hermaphrothrobic norpses with testicumulus phobias.
Here's how it works. For instance, take the following text:
"George W. Bush is a forking idiot and I love lilac eyeliner and pumps with pink chiffon tampon menstrual feelings hurt kind of like do I look fat in these jeans"
Presto! It gets the following rating from the Gender Genie robot: Female Score: 60 / Male Score: 22
Now that's weird because, being a male, I shouldn't write like a female, right? er...
What does the Gender Genie say about this? ....
"Guns are great and hunting and peeing on the floor with chewing tobacco porno muscles nascar farts with steak boxing baseball football basketball sports porn and I scratch the war with explosions car chases cleavage and mommy"
The surprising thing is, according to the Gender Genie robot, this speech gets the rating of: Female Score: 172
Male Score: 42 ... which means that it's even MORE girly than the first one!
The Gender Genie knows what's what, and you can't escape its perfect robotic logic - so try it yourself and find out whether you write like a girl or a guy.
And, hey, just so you know that the Gender Genie GOTS IT GOIN ON - that last paragraph was scored: Female Score: 35
Male Score: 103
BOOYA! (I be male)
J$
PS: You can find the Gender Genie online at: http://bookblog.net/gender/genie.html ¶ 10:14 PM
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Yeah.. but the prior paragraph was rated female, and it was longer.
"But this robot exists in cyberspace, which means that he is non-existent in reality, and only then quasi-existent. He is the Gender Genie, and his function is to take a piece of text (words) that you supply him - and he inputs your text into his handy-dandy robot text measuring robot machine - and presto! He can tell whether you are a male or female! He can also rate just how "male" or "female" your text is, which can be somewhat disconcerting to sexobulators and closet hermaphrothrobic norpses with testicumulus phobias. "
"But this robot exists in cyberspace, which means that he is non-existent in reality, and only then quasi-existent. He is the Gender Genie, and his function is to take a piece of text (words) that you supply him - and he inputs your text into his handy-dandy robot text measuring robot machine - and presto! He can tell whether you are a male or female! He can also rate just how "male" or "female" your text is, which can be somewhat disconcerting to sexobulators and closet hermaphrothrobic norpses with testicumulus phobias. "
Turns out, all my blogs are transgender except ribs-n-corn pudding.
This suggests to me that writing is a chic activity.
This suggests to me that writing is a chic activity.
Ha! That's funny. Maybe the Gender Genie is a trick used by Feminists to make us guys feel all girly and weak and impotent and flaccid. Just for shytes and giggles, I put in my latest blog called "100 posts" and it came out male, but only by the narrowest of margins: Female Score: 783
Male Score: 977
Whew. That's a relief!
By the way, I wonder what gender the words "hermaphrothrobic" and "sexobulator" and "testicumulus" are?
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Male Score: 977
Whew. That's a relief!
By the way, I wonder what gender the words "hermaphrothrobic" and "sexobulator" and "testicumulus" are?
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